I wish I was somewhere tropical right now. I wish that I was with a bunch of friends getting ready to go out to a tropical party on the beach. I wish that my head wasn't numb from pain and my eyes swollen... I was talking to God and wondering.. Why does life happen the way it does. My prayer is to accept life for what it is and not try to change it. I'm brokenhearted right now. I don't think you ever stop loving someone that you love completely. My prayers right now are all confused. I'm praying for him to come back to me, but I'm leaving it in God's hands. He knows what is right for me. As many tears as I've cried I'm finally beginning to feel a peace. God gives us miracle chances. Sometimes it is to fix what went wrong, sometimes its to start fresh. I know that I love Joshua dearly. I know that I would give anything for him to walk through my door right now and tell me this is a horrible dream and will all be over soon. But I also know that nothing can be fixed with a magic wand. I love a man and that won't change. I want him to come back to me. But I want what God intends for me. I'll keep my heart pure for that....